Windows Maintainence Security

After your PC has been under maintained for so long, it tends to get laggy, choppy, slow download speeds, and much more. In this guide, I will be covering some great ways in which you can use to maintain your PC to it's utmost condition.


Common Windows Fixes

Windows is not like an old television - by this I mean that giving it a good smack won't get it running again. If anything, it will damage the computer even more. In this part of my guide, I will be adding some useful tips on how to fix your computer from simple and common problems.

It's not coming on

This is what I'd like to call a "Dumb F**k" problem. Simply, plug the damn thing into the outlet or turn the switch on the top/back of your computer. If none of that works, your PSU is f**ked. Go buy a new one ^_^

The Internet Isn't Working

Restart your router, make sure everything is connected via Ethernet cables, and restart your PC. If none of that works, try bitching to your ISP or maybe even paying the bill ;)

(some program) Has Preformed An Illegal Action, It Will Need To Close

Simply click "Ok" or "Yes" when the exit program box pops up, It's nothing to worry about. If you continue to recieve this in the future, write down the "Details" of the offending program and ask a professional.

(BSOD) Blue Screen of Death

Nobody likes this little bastard, and I don't think anyone will. If you get one of these, a simply restart will solve the problem. But if it persists, write down what it says and consult a PC Techie.

"I cant get rid of this virus!!1!1!one one HALP!"

Did you try running your scans in safe mode? That usually does the trick ;). If not, run Hijackthis, and give us a log, we'll see what we can do for you ;).

I can't close this program! It froze!

The 10 letter guide to Windows, CTRL+ALT+DEL. Press those 3 keys at the same time, find the offending application, highlight it, and press end task. If the problem persists, try re-installing it. If CTRL+DEL won't fix anything, press CTRL+ESC and it will open your start menu in where you can restart your computer.

My computer says I need to install updates! How?

Check out Windows Update, it will show a list of Microsoft-made updates for your operating system as long as it is supported. Sadly, for Windows 98 users, support for that OS was dropped not too long ago.

Hard Drive Not Found

O shi-. It's times like this that you had wished you made that emergency boot disk. This is why you should always have one at bay, ready to go into action. Things like this can happen unexpectedly at any moment. If that doesn't do the job, you may need to restart your bios or replace your computer's internal battery.

Can't Detect Mouse/Keyboard

This usually happens when your using a USB mouse or keyboard. To fix this, simply plug in a regular PS/2 keyboard, and enable usb devices in the computers bios.

By the way, always check for new drivers for your hardware!

Spyware and Adware

Spyware is becoming a rising threat in todays society. This type of software gathers your personal information, gives it to advertisers, spam marketing, ect ect so some laughing bastard on the other side of the Ethernet cable is getting paid for it. It can also control what you do on your computer, and can sometimes be a bitch to remove. But then again, adware is no friend of yours either. Adware is exactly what it's called, it's a type of ware that displays ads wherever you are. I've had it before, and it's not pretty(By this, I mean that unstoppable popup's keep coming and coming). Both of these types of software totally suck ass through a straw and you don't want to encounter them, trust me. This part of the tutorial is vital so that your PC doesn't become a mess like this.

AdAware

This little dandy is a favorite of mine for one reason - it does what it was made to do. Defiantly not the most powerful thing out there, but defiantly not the worst. Not only does this small package pack a punch against Spyware, it also deals a fair shot towards Adware, Trojans, Virus's, Tracking Cookies (Even though they're not really a bad thing, they can still be a nuisance some times), Exploits, and much more. I'd recommend this one to pretty much everyone who owns a PC.
Download Link - Ad-Aware 2007 (Free)

Spyware Blaster

It doesn't seem like much, but it does an excellent job of protecting you from having malicious software installed unnoticed. This one tool adds an ass load of malicious sites to your "Restricted Website List" In both Internet Explorer and Mozilla Firefox (Sorry Opera users :(). I have nothing else to say about this one except for that when you download and install it, make it your first task to press the update button ;).
Download Link - Spyware Blaster (Free)

Windows Defender

Windows Defender, by (God forgive me for saying it) Microsoft, is actually a half decent computer utility. Seriously. It works in real time, protects against intrusions, popups, unwanted sluggish performance, adware, and spyware. It also provides tips as to how to handle the situation (Lol give m$ moneyz?) and I'd defiantly recommend it.
Download Link - Windows Defender (Free)

Virus Removal/Protection
Computer virus's have been around since, well, since computers have been around, and their type of usage has not changed at all. I'll list a few handy-dandy programs now in a minute, but first, I'd like to share with you a few tips as to keep yourself safe.

• Only download from sites you trust
• Always scan a file before running/extracting
• Use a firewall

Be sure to follow those to make sure that you keep yourself [s]STD[/s] virus free. Now, it's time for you to get yourself some virus protection.

AVG AntiVirus

Is there really that much to be said? AVG is an excellent program, it's better then pretty much most of the competition, including the ones that cost money, and it's 100% free! This anti-virus is a freaking' tank when it comes to virus removal. It takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin'. (I said there wasen't much to be said ;))
Download Link - AVG Anti-Virus (Free)

avast! Home Edition

It'd be nice to notice how I italicized "most" in my AVG paragraph. Well, this one is like AVG, on roids. I personally named it the "Clusterf**ker" as that is exactly what it does to threats it finds. It wipes them the f**k off the hard drive, and thats why I like about this one. It'll keep you safe and secure from many, many different threats ;)
Download Link - avast! Home Edition (free)

Defragmentation
Defragmentation, also known as defragging, is a process in which the files of the computer are physically rearranged in order to decrease the fragmentation of the hard drive. Another process which defragmentation uses to tweak your computer is the compaction process which files are compressed in order to create free space and in return, slow the process of fragmentation.

Auslogics Disk Defrag

This program is pretty much "the shit" to have when it comes to defragging your hard drive. It does an excellent job of defragging and is a million times better then the "Disk Defragger" which came with your copy of whatever version of windows you run on. This program works great with Windows 2000, XP, 2003 Server, and Vista and is bound to give your PC that little cleanup it's been waiting for.
Download Link - Auslogics Disk Defrag (free)

Various Cleanups
This part of the guide is dedicated to various cleanups which will help improve Window's performance.

CCleaner

CCleaner, or Crap Cleaner, whatever you want to call it, does a great job at cleaning up your temp files. The first time I ran it, it deleted 6gb's of temp crap on my HD which had no use but to take up space. I recommend this program to anyone as it is very helpful in tweaking your PC's performance as well as opening up some extra space on your HD.
Download Link - CCleaner (free)

Rootkit Unhooker

Rootkit Unhooker specializes in removing rootkits which have been hooked with virus's, spyware, and other bad shit. Sometimes, they hook themselves to rootkits and Rootkit Unhooker is your last resort to getting rid of them. I really recommend this one as it helps you keep your computer crap-free. Be careful what your doing though, sometimes you can crash your computer if you unhook the wrong things ;).
Download Link - Rootkit Unhooker (free)

Other Helpful Utilities

Speedfan

Speedfan is a helpful utility which monitors your PC temps using sensors on the motherboard, and gives you the ability to change the speed of your fans if they're connected properly. My average temperatures are 38 under load and 28 while idling. So, if your PC temp suddenly goes up in the 50+'s, I suggest giving your PC a quick dust down, inside and out :P.
Download Link - Speedfan (free)

CPU-Z

CPU-Z is a handy little tool which will be able to tell you every little bit about your PC, right down to the speed of your RAM, your socket type, what version of USB drivers you use, and gets even more indepth from there. It's a must have
Download Link - CPU-Z (free)

Firefox

Firefox is a top notch web browser which incorporates high speeds with grand protection. This beast is well tamed to treat you well during your journey into the internet. I've been using it for years and it's has since served me greatly. There are alot of awesome ad-ons for it to enhance your web browsing experience even more! Enjoy!
Download Link - Firefox 2 (free)

Opera

Opera is an excellent browser. It ranks with Firefox and is definatly a browser of choice. It has a "Speed Dial" script which allows you fast access to any of your sites, .torrent support when your downloading, rich text editing, and much more. It's one of my recommendations.
Download Link - Opera (free)

notepad2

Notepad2 is an enhanced version of Microsoft's "Notepad". It comes with syntax highlighting, line numbering, and lots of great tools for programming. It's defiantly a programming tool of choice for those who are into that sort of thing.
Download Link - Notepad2 (free)